Atkins, Day Five

Today I woke up knowing it would be a crazy busy day. I had back to back classes and meetings until around 9pm, so it was a challenge finding food to fit in my schedule.

• 9:30 am - omelet made with onions, bacon & cheese, 16 oz Diet Coke
  
  


• 2:01 pm - piece of Trident Whitening gum


• 4:50 pm - strawberry banana Dannon Light n' Fit yogurt, half a bag of salted cashews, piece of Trident sugar-free gum, 20 oz Diet Coke


• 9:50 pm - high fiber Wasa bread with liverwurst and mustard

The omelet was pretty filling, thankfully, and carried me through most of the day. My stomach was growling just before my evening class, so I grabbed the yogurt and cashews at the school cafeteria. I lamented that there were 11 grams of carbs per serving (7 of which were sugar), but as it turns out I had little need to worry since I was too tired to eat very much when I got home.

I noticed that my packs of gum all say they have less than 1 gram of carbs per serving, which is all good and well, but if I eat several pieces a day, I suspect it starts adding up. For that reason, I've been trying to keep track of gum and mints I eat as well, as they could be a hidden damage area.

Otherwise today was not bad. I just wish I'd made more of an effort to get my full nutrition in.

Atkins, Day Four

I slept pretty late today, but didn't get started eating until the afternoon.

• 3:25 pm - 16 oz Diet Coke


• 3:46 pm - high fiber Wasa bread with liverwurst & mustard
  
  


• 4:07 pm - mint green tea with half & half and Splenda
  
  


• 6:02 pm - 16 oz water, One-a-Day WeightSmart multivitamin, chromium picolinate


• 6:05 pm - beef dish with cheese, 16 oz Diet Coke
  
  


• 9:22 pm - turkey, cheese, herb salad, mustard, and low-fat mayonnaise on half a low-carb salsa-flavored wrap, 16 oz Diet Coke
  
  


• 10:40 pm - smoked gouda


• 12:57 am - 16 oz Diet Coke, sugar-free cranberry Jello
  
  


• 2:30 am - smoked gouda


• 2:45 am - grilled chicken patty, 16 oz Diet Coke
  
  


• 3:00 am - faux cheesecake with Jello mixed in, 2 dill pickles, handful of raw almonds

Today was pretty good eating. The mint green tea was such a treat - it may just be my new favorite sweet. I realize that the things I eat get stranger as it gets later into the night... this is probably how I gained weight in the first place.

The Jello was also really tasty - the cranberry was a great flavor, and I liked that it wasn't too sweet. My boyfriend and I both agreed we should think ahead and make Jello more often.

I was stoked to grill the ground chicken patty on the George Foreman grill as well. Somehow using a counter-top appliance that wipes clean is much more appealing than getting out (or cleaning) a big old frying pan.

Atkins, Day Three

I woke up pretty late today and was feeling rather grumpy. I noticed that my pee smelled absolutely terrible, which I guess means the diet is working, but my weight was actually up half a pound, at 180. Hmm.

• 3:40 pm - bacon, eggs scrambled with salt, pepper & hot sauce, coffee with half & half and Splenda
  
  


• 10:15 pm - ground beef dish (from yesterday) with cheese, 32 oz water


• 10:48 pm - 2 cheese dogs


• 11:13 pm - dill pickle, One-a-Day WeightSmart multivitamin, chromium picolinate supplement


• 1:40 am - turkey and cheese roll-ups, 16 oz Diet Coke
  
  


• 1:50 am - dill pickle, 16 oz Diet Coke

Good day. Easy enough.

Interesting Links

I was reading Slashfood (probably an unwise habit when dieting) and came across a link to this post on Diet Blog:
What do 300 Calorie Meals Look Like?

A familiar format, but do I daresay, some of mine look better? ;-)

They linked to the photo source, My Photo Diet, a visual weight loss guide designed by two doctors. Nice.

Atkins, Day Two

My weight this morning? 179.5. That's 2 pounds less than it was at the same time yesterday.

I'm very tempted to say "Oh it's just water weight," except that looking back on yesterday, I can see I drank a lot of liquids. This could be really good.

• 8:04 am - handful of raw almonds


• 3:49 pm - 12 oz can Diet Coke Plus
  
  


• 4:48 pm - Burger King chicken Caesar salad
  
  


• 5:10 pm - dill pickle spear


• 6:15 pm - 2 cheese dogs (grilled), 16 oz Diet Dr Pepper, 16 oz water


• 9:30 pm - ground beef cooked with garlic, onions, green pepper, mushrooms, chili powder, red pepper, paprika, cumin & hot sauce, topped with sharp Cheddar cheese; 32 oz water
  
  


• 11:20 pm - coffee with half & half and Splenda, 4 slices of pepperoni


• 2:18 am - cheese dog


• 4:47 am - 12 oz Diet Dr Pepper, dill pickle spear, 2 slices deli turkey, handful of raw almonds, One-a-Day WeightSmart multivitamin

Today worked out pretty well, though I stayed up really late working (strange for a Friday night, I know). I went to the grocery and stocked up on all kinds of meat and cheese and veggies, which made my boyfriend quite happy.

The Burger King salad was spectacular, though I hope I didn't go over for carbs - I know the dressing had 4 grams and the salad included some baby carrots and tomatoes, which I enjoyed immensely.

The beef dish was an interesting caprice, in that I had planned to mix it with more Red Pack picante sauce, but I forgot that I had put it back on the shelf at the grocery. I remembered this just as I started rummaging the cupboard to add it. Whoops. It challenged me to come up with a more robust combination of spices, and these proved quite delicious. Mixed with lots of sharp Cheddar cheese, it was fabulous.

Atkins, Day One

Technically we started Atkins with dinner last night: 3 mini cheeseburgers and a big salad with carb-free Caesar dressing.



My first thought on waking this morning: Wow, I'm really hungry.

There have been days when I've gone to bed without eating, and not woken up so hungry. I had to rush to move my car, so I didn't have time to eat anything, but eventually my stomach growling subsided. Still, I was surprised. Does this mean my metabolism was actually doing something, or is it simply that a lack of carbs (and not too much food overall yesterday) causes a lack of energy?

For simplicity's sake, I'm going to keep a running list of things I eat and drink today with times so I can track my appetite (I won't do this everyday, promise):

• 9:44 am - chunk of Cheddar cheese (approx 1 oz), big glass of Diet Coke


• 10:10 am - 3-egg omelet with mushrooms and Cheddar cheese, cooked in butter; One-a-Day Weight Smart multivitamin; 16 oz glass of water
  
  


• 12:05 pm - 16 oz water


• 2:25 pm - fresh herb salad with creamy Caesar dressing, 16 oz glass of Diet Coke
  
  


• 4:20 pm - hazelnut coffee with half & half and Splenda


• 5:50 pm - handful of raw almonds


• 7:06 pm - 16 oz water


• 7:33 pm - grilled hot Italian sausage cooked with garlic, onions, and green peppers in spicy tomato sauce, 2 large glasses of Diet Coke
  
  


• 8:39 pm - handful of raw almonds


• 9:10 pm - piece of Cheddar cheese (about 1/2 oz)


• 10:40 pm - "cheesecake" made with fat-free cream cheese, vanilla protein powder, Splenda & sugar-free apricot preserves

I guess that wasn't too insane. I felt light-headed most of the day, but I'm pretty sure it's unrelated.

The sausage dish was fantastic and really enjoyable, in part I think because it was so hot and spicy. By grilling the sausage first, we drained a lot of the grease out of them, so I didn't feel overwhelmed with fat like I did the last time on Atkins.

Toward the end of the evening, I was really tired and cranky and kept wanting to snack on something like crackers or make a PBJ sandwich, but I resisted. The fake cheesecake really satisfied that dessert-type craving, though in the future I'll probably make it with regular cream cheese, since the fat-free was slightly unpalatable.

I don't really like counting carbs, but I think my break-down goes something like: 2-3 for cheese, 5 from tomato sauce, 5 from apricot preserves, and probably 3 or so from almonds; total = 15-16, which is still below the 20 I'm allowed and leaves room for any incidental ones.

The Post I've Been Dreading

I would imagine that my absence speaks volumes in this case, but it doesn't take too much imagination to realize that I've gone off my diet again.

I barely made it two weeks on this new diet, and I was loving it... but I just got sick of dieting completely. My rationalizations are as follows:

• it was way, way too expensive
• it took too much time and concentration away from schoolwork
• no matter what I did or ate, my weight stayed in the same fluctuation of about 180-184
• I felt terrible, overly emotional, and increasingly really deprived and miserable
• I didn't need any more sources of stress in my life

Ridiculous, I know. At first I only planned to go off the diet for a few days until we sorted our finances out (a bit of a snafu with student loans and such). We ordered a bunch of take-out and were eating one big meal per day, usually as cheaply as possible. At first I enjoyed it, but I was even getting tired of that.

As the time off my meal plan increased past a week, we started eating a little more sensibly, buying ingredients for sandwiches or more balanced meals.. but then we also started buying ice cream and treats. While it was certainly a relief to not have to plan and prepare all these fussy little meals, it's not like it freed me of having to deal with food entirely. I recognized that I had become despondent and depressed, but I just stopped caring about trying to lose weight. As it was, I neither lost nor gained weight, which made my efforts at dieting even more frustrating.

For simplicity's sake, let's say my body operates on the following equation:
weight loss = diet x exercise

No matter what I ate, then, if my exercise remained at 0, so would my weight loss. This is a very easy concept, but I just couldn't accept it. I was furious that the only changes to my weight came in retaining water and then seeming to "lose" when my body stopped retaining. The bottom line was never going down, not even gradually.

This is the state of mind I was in yesterday. I had talked at length with my parents and my brother (all of whom are struggling to lose weight as well) about how frustrating and demoralizing this all is. My father told me how his doctor had said that Atkins is good for short-term, quick weight loss, but not really a healthy lifestyle. My brother insists that Atkins is the way for him, but he's stopped losing weight because he cheats so much. My mother meanwhile persists in losing weight on NutriSystem, but very gradually, and she's not always happy about it, causing her to cheat often as well.

I thought it over yesterday, and as I was leaving for my evening class, I remembered we needed groceries, so I asked my boyfriend if he would pick something up for dinner and have it here when I got home (since I hate rushing from class to catch the grocery before it closes at 10). I surprised myself by asking if we could do Atkins for a while, but he was immediately agreeable, so I figured we'd go for it. I know all the health risks, and I myself would be the first to clamor on about how unnatural it is.

But right now, I want to lose some damn weight and not have to constantly think so much about it. For now, I'm going to say I'll just do it through the end of the semester (which is these 2 weeks), then see how I feel and evaluate my progress. Maybe once I have more time and my finances sorted out, I can give sensible dieting another crack. I'm also going to try to do this without all the rigamoralle of photos and blogging every single meal, since I worry that while that keeps me accountable and honest with myself, it also makes it very easy to decide I don't feel like staying on the diet because those activities take too much time or are a hassle.

The way I feel about all this is kind of ashamed, lazy, and overly simplistic, but I see it like this (forgive the extended metaphor): if I were to go to the gym right now and get on an exercise bike or something, yes, it would kick my butt. I would be sore and exhausted and gasping for breath in no time. Meanwhile, part way through writing this entry, I got a phone call and had to run downstairs (I live on the 5th floor of an apartment building). I decided to take the stairs, and since I was beating myself up, I declared that I would take them back up, too, which is something I almost never do. By the fourth floor, my legs were aching and I was starting to lose my breath, but I realized I only had one more floor to go, so I ran the last set. When I got back to my apartment, I was really out of breath and my legs hurt, and I spent a minute berating myself, but when I was finished, I thought "ehn, that really wasn't so bad," and I know that the next time I take the stairs (which I plan to start doing more regularly), it will be a little bit easier.

So with all this diet and exercise stuff, I know that the road is still long and difficult, even if I take a brief short-cut. The thing is, I feel like if I have some little jump forward, lose a few pounds so I can say "yes, I made some progress finally," then it won't be so abysmal to think of running the next leg of the marathon and really pulling my discipline and faculties together. I realize that my language is full of rationalizations and justifications, but I'm at a pretty desperate point to just see something improve.

As of today, my weight is 181.5. Let's see what happens.

GI Day Seventeen

I woke up exhausted from all the paperwork and organizing I did yesterday, and I was incredible stressed and overwhelmed because I had so much schoolwork to do that I couldn't see my family for Easter. As I dragged myself around through the day, I really grew to resent this fact, and eventually I just blew it.

Breakfast

• oatmeal with blueberries, soy nuts, cinnamon & Splenda
• egg white omelet with green pepper, onion & low-fat Cheddar cheese
• green tea with Splenda

I do love this breakfast, but I wasn't as satisfied this time as usual. I think hormonally, my body just wants more calories this time of the month or something because as soon as I finished, I was in the mood for something else.


Lunch

• beef and cheese tacos with salsa, lettuce, tomatoes, avocado & fresh cilantro
• green grapes

I did not eat right away and instead made myself work for four hours between meals, but I wasn't happy about it. Literally, all day, I was thinking about what I was going to make for my next meal. We didn't have enough groceries in the house to really put together a substantive dinner, and as I fretted about where I would find a grocery that was open, I found myself really struggling to concentrate on my work.


Dinner

• Papa John's pizza (not pictured)

I made the conscientious and appalling decision that I was just not bothering with the diet anymore. I was annoyed about missing Easter to do work, I was mad at myself for not buying groceries sooner, and I was stressed about how I could even afford all this expensive food anymore seeing as I was worrying about how to come up with this month's rent.

Basically, I sabotaged myself, and woefully disregarded all the "progress" I was making in favor of doing whatever I wanted so I could concentrate on my work.

I'm not proud, and I wish I could say I rebounded, but as you'll see, I didn't.

GI Day Sixteen

I woke up a little earlier than usual today, but mystifyingly the alarm I set never went off... quite frustrating. My boyfriend and I had a rather protracted argument, the result of which was that I had to spend the day doing paperwork (bleh).


Breakfast

• lite whole grain English muffin with low sodium deli turkey and a bit of low-sodium ham
• almonds
• 1% milk

Despite complaining that he hated the low-sodium turkey, my boyfriend ate enough that I was short what I needed for this sandwich. Fortunately, I had the ham to swap in, and I think it's about even.

Can't say enough good things about these English muffins. Awesome.


Lunch

• beef and cheese tacos with salsa, lettuce, tomatoes, avocado & fresh cilantro
• green grapes

Another favorite, definitely enjoyable. The avocado was a bit under-ripe, but still tasty.


Snack

• whole wheat tortilla chips with salsa, creamy Parmesan dressing, and low-fat Cheddar cheese

I got these delicious whole wheat tortilla chips, which made for excellent nachos. I was in a lousy mood when I made these, but I perked right up with how much I enjoyed them.


Dinner

• toasted ham & low-fat Cheddar on flatbread with mustard and mayonnaise
• lettuce, tomatoes, bell pepper & fat-free Italian dressing
• dill pickle

This sandwich was fantastic. I baked and then broiled the sandwich to give it a crisp pannini-like texture, which contrasted beautifully with the melty cheese and creamy warm mayo.

The salad was delicious, and I was stoked that the meal called for a dill pickle, since I absolutely love those. Admittedly, I use them as sort of "free" rewards for myself on occasion, so it was nice that this one was sanctioned.

Evening Snack
skipped

Seventh Weigh-In

181. Down 2 pounds from my last official weigh-in... though actually down 5 since Monday.

I cannot take any credit for this, since I'm sure it's just water weight and having skipped so many meals. Once again, I've got to admonish myself for not exercising or doing anything else proactive in weight loss.

Though for now, honestly, I'd settle for feeling better (and for my nose to stop dripping) and getting my life back on track. Solid diet, healthy sleep schedule, and a good dose of catching up on work should do it.

GI Day Fifteen

Once again today I slept very late and woke up feeling incredibly worn out and emotional. I am not sure what's going on (maybe it's hormones?) but I just don't feel like myself.

I had to go to the grocery before I could make breakfast, and the U2 song "With or Without You" came on. I didn't even realize I was listening to it, but I was kind of singing along in my head, then felt like bawling. For no real reason, I just wanted to sit in the middle of the aisle and have a good cry. I maintained my composure, but was confused at that impulse, as well as the way I kept snapping at my boyfriend for relatively innocuous comments or requests all afternoon.

I dunno, I'm just very on edge lately. Perhaps it's stress, perhaps it's too much sleep and not enough diet/exercise, perhaps it's everything at once.


Breakfast

• lite whole grain English muffin with low-sodium deli turkey
• 1% milk
• almonds

I found this meal quite a nice pick-me-up after feeling so lousy for so long. I was glad to have a fridge restocked with fresh ingredients, and I threw out the rest of the things which were on the edge of going bad, thinking it best not to take chances with our health.

I never thought I cared very much for English muffins, but these light whole grain ones are just fantastic - I think I'm officially a convert.


Lunch

• beef tacos with salsa, low-fat Cheddar cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, avocado, and fresh cilantro
• green grapes

I made sure that I cooked this beef the day I got it so it wouldn't go bad like the last batch. Fortunately all the vegetables were fresh - if anything the avocado was a bit under ripe.

My boyfriend and I both really enjoyed these immensely, and it was nice to cook a meal together again.


Afternoon Snack

• celery, low-sodium ham & fat free cream cheese

When I read the ingredients for this snack, I thought it was intriguing, but I wasn't quite sure how it would all come together. This method.. didn't quite work. When my boyfriend saw me preparing it, he asked "Is that snack called Sliced Member?" Yeah, gross.

The taste was not bad, but the textures were a little baffling. I'll have to think through some better way of combining these ingredients (maybe just have ham and cheese roll-ups with the celery on the side).


Dinner

• whole grain flat bread pizza made with spicy tomato sauce, low-fat mozzarella cheese, onions, green pepper, and Canadian bacon
• fresh herb salad with baby carrots, cherry tomatoes, and fat-free raspberry pecan dressing
• green grapes

This pizza was fantastic - I baked it rather than broiled it, and the crust got nice and crisp while still remaining doughy in the center. The only down-side was that because I didn't cook the onions and peppers first, they had a slightly raw flavor. It was still delicious, but for the time I baked it, I might as well have cooked the toppings first.

The salad was a little distressing because I had wanted to get more of my very favorite lite creamy Parmesan dressing and... they didn't have any! I know, not a big deal, and yet, I was gutted. This dressing was merely okay, but certainly paled in comparison to the Parmesan I've come to love so much.


Evening Snack
skipped
I dozed off before I got around to making the yogurt I'd planned and decided it wasn't a big deal to skip. I hope I'm not wrong about this, as I've been doing a lot of skipping this week.

A Note

I'll go back and post the days I'm missing as soon as I can, but I just wanted to make a note of something.

This morning I was feeling kind of lighter than usual, my pants were fitting loser and such, so I decided to weigh myself before my shower. 179.5. Crazy.

My guess is that I'm dehydrated and that as soon as I get some food and water in me, I'll be back up to my normal weight, but it's amazing to me how much these numbers fluctuate with seemingly no changes otherwise.

GI Day Fourteen

I slept really late and got almost nothing done today. I've been really irritable and light-headed, with my head throbbing whenever I move. Not fun at all.


Breakfast

• huevos rancheros made with egg whites, onion, green pepper, tomato, hot sauce, low-fat Cheddar cheese and fresh cilantro
• light rye Wasa bread with Smart Balance peanut butter
• green grapes

While delicious, the components of this meal didn't really seem to go together - it was more than a bit strange. The eggs themselves were positively sublime, and this was a nice tasty meal.

I continued feeling lousy while I did some reading for school, and I noticed some stomach weirdness too, probably from an off-kilter sleep schedule and not eating regularly scheduled meals.


Afternoon Snack

• hummus Masbacha with low-fat Cheddar cheese
• baby carrots

I got out the ingredients to make tacos when I realized the ground beef had gone bad, so I was quite annoyed and frustrated as I threw out $5 worth of meat.

I accidentally cooked the cheese and hummus mixture longer than usual, but found it was a very good mistake as it was a great improvement in texture and the flavors combined more.

I ate this snack, then dozed off for a while (probably from the sinus medication I took). I woke up still feeling crappy, by which time it was too late to go to the grocery. Ah well.

Evening
I didn't really have a structured meal, since I was not feeling well. I grazed on a few things around the house, including 2 chunks of Toblerone, 2-3 ounces of low-fat mozzarella cheese, and some big slugs of sugary cranberry-raspberry juice my boyfriend had gotten.

I figured it was okay to go light on the meals since I had almost zero physical activity - the times I was awake, I was laying down and reading, and otherwise I was dozing off.

I'm tired of feeling lousy, and I don't know what's going on with my body. Tomorrow I will have to make an effort to eat the proper amount of meals to give my body enough strength to fight off whatever kind of sickness this may be.

GI Day Thirteen

I had a lunchtime meeting and, predictably or not, I slept in until I had just enough time to shower, dress, and rush over to it. I kind of worried that my stomach would growl and embarrass me since I didn't eat, but strangely I wasn't at all hungry, even once I got home.

I didn't make my breakfast meal until around 2pm, confirming that I am indeed back on the stupid screwy sleep schedule I escaped for a mere week.

Breakfast

• oatmeal with almonds, cinnamon, nutmeg, and vanilla-flavored protein powder
• turkey bacon
• green tea (not on diet but allowed)
• dried apricots

This breakfast was nice and satisfying, though I halved the amount of bacon called for. I was substituting turkey bacon for Canadian bacon and I just didn't want to bother with the math, so I made what seemed like a reasonable portion and only later learned that it was not enough.

I forgot about a fruit at first, so I had these apricots just after I'd finished the rest.


Lunch

• grilled cheese and tomato on whole grain flat bread
• fresh herb salad with lite creamy Parmesan dressing
• sliced kiwi
• almonds
• 1% milk

Wow, what a perfect meal. It was a rainy, cold day outside, and I was actually craving grilled cheese and tomato soup. I found this recipe and jumped at it, swapping the flat bread for whole wheat - I think this way it resembles a pannini. I cooked it all under the broiler to make the cheese and tomato warm and gooey and the bread nice and crisp. Really hit the spot.

Combined with my beloved herb salad, I found this meal just about perfect in every way.


Afternoon Snack

• baked tortilla chips with salsa, lite creamy Parmesan dressing, and low-fat Cheddar cheese

I had this snack when I got home from class and found it so intensely satisfying that I didn't feel like eating anything else.

I only had the crumbly bits at the bottom of the chip bag, so I spread the ingredients over them instead of mixing them as a dip - wow, what a difference. So wonderful.


Dinner, Evening Snack
skipped.
I went to bed relatively early because I was still feeling light-headed and wasn't at all hungry.

GI Day Twelve

When I woke up, I was feeling really ill, probably from not eating or sleeping enough yesterday. I skipped both of my classes, the first time I've done so all semester, and I slept most of the day.

I woke up in the afternoon furious with myself, realizing I was just being a wuss and should have pulled through. I decided to take advantage of my day off to handle some financial issues, organize my paperwork, and generally try to get my life back in some semblance of order.

This included getting back on my diet after five days off, so I started by weighing in. I didn't photograph it, since I had given myself permission to skip weigh-in this week, but it was a whopping 186, up 3 pounds from last week. Not at all surprising considering the way I carried on, but not exactly thrilling.


Breakfast

• oatmeal with blueberries, soy nuts, cinnamon, and Splenda
• egg whites scrambled with onions, green pepper, and low-fat Cheddar cheese
• green tea (not on diet, but allowed)

I found a lot of the food in our fridge had gone a little dicey while we were away, so it was a little tricky coming up with something palatable for breakfast. Fortunately the blueberries are still hanging in there, and they plumped up when I added boiling water.

I didn't even try to make the egg whites into an omelet, as I've just accepted that they're not going to hold that shape (or I don't really know how to make omelets).


Afternoon Snack

• Dannon Light n' Fit white chocolate raspberry yogurt with wheat germ
• almonds

I really love this snack because it's just the perfect bit of something sweet and crunchy. Fantastic.


Lunch

• whole grain flat bread pizza made with tomato sauce, low-fat mozzarella cheese, onions, green pepper, and Canadian bacon
• baby spinach salad with carrots, cherry tomatoes, and fat free Italian dressing
• dried fruit

I was happy we had enough ingredients to make what is quickly becoming one of my favorites. Once again it took forever to eat (something to do with the spinach and the carrots I think), but it was definitely worth it and I enjoyed it immensely.

Afternoon & Evening Snack
skipped

Because I slept so late, I didn't really have enough hours to achieve real hunger. I'm not sure if it was tiredness or laziness which prevailed, but the end result was that I skipped my snacks. I'd been feeling light-headed all day, and I also found my stomach was pretty upset still, giving a queasy, unwell feeling.

Dinner

• chicken salad with lettuce and tomato on Finish flat bread
• almonds
• dried apricots
• 1% milk

I was so glad to find the rest of the can of chicken breast in the fridge, and my boyfriend defrosted some of this great dark flat bread his mother brought back recently from Finland. I substituted almonds for peanuts, since my boyfriend had snacked on them all earlier. This was a nice, mild meal, and it helped settle my stomach some before I went to bed.

GI Day Eleven

We didn't get home from vacation until about 4am, so I expected to be really cranky and tired today - instead I had the opposite and found I was downright perky, though I still slept in until just before my afternoon class.

Breakfast

• deli turkey on lite whole grain English muffin with melted low-fat mozzarella cheese (not pictured

I had barely enough time to get to class, so I threw this sandwich together and shoved it in my mouth as I walked. I was annoyed at myself for abandoning what has become my very pleasant breakfast ritual, but I was so light-headed I didn't really care.

Rest of Day
I didn't really have any more structured meals. When I got home from class, I had very little appetite and even less inclination to prepare food. I picked at leftovers, especially chips and salsa and cheese. I thought with amusement that it's a good thing we only have "diet food" around, as I could have done a lot more damage. I ended up going to bed early without eating anything more substantial, and I woke up several times in the night, probably because I was hungry.

Weekend

(This entry includes days 7-10, not really on the diet.)

I went on a short vacation to visit old friends over the weekend, and obviously I was not on the diet.

On the drive up I ate two doughnuts, candy, Sun Chips, and glazed walnuts. For dinner that evening I had a meatball parmigiana sub and plenty of whiskey drinks.

The next day we went hiking on a nearby mountain, and in addition to a lot of alcohol, I had dried cranberries, a Dunkin Donuts breakfast sandwich and a medium vanilla chai.

On the drive home from the mountain I had Burger King chicken fingers and fries, then for dinner later on I had eggplant parmigiana with spaghetti, a disgusting green apple flavored malt liquor, chocolate covered cherries and graham crackers, and piles of other intoxicants and beverages (this was a big party weekend).

On Sunday my appetite was not what it probably could have been, but it was still pretty strong. I put away a tuna melt and onion rings for brunch, then later on had a big dinner of turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, and green beans.

All in all it was quite the gluttonous weekend, and I can't even pretend that hiking and running around with friends even put a dent in the unhealthy ways I ate. But I had fun, and that certainly counts for a lot.